Word: Colin Wiseman 2018-01-04 15:48:38
When I was 18 and fresh out of high school, I moved to Tofino, BC, to learn how to surf. Since I was without transportation, my parents loaned me their minivan for a few months. It was a silver Dodge Caravan—the old boxy one with a four-cylinder engine that got maybe 20 mpg. We’d taken an extended road trip through the American West in it during my preteen years and my parents dubbed it the “Dream Machine.” Once I pulled the bench seats out, it could fit 11 people and a dog. It had a tape deck. I had Metallica’s Master of Puppets. It was way better than hitchhiking.
Despite my affinity for the Dream Machine, it wasn’t pulling much for style points. Minivans were for soccer moms. Old people. Not surfers or snowboarders.
Once that summer had passed, I went to college in Kelowna and rode transit, bumming rides to the mountain, traveling by bicycle, making it work. Within a year or two I bought a high-mileage Acura. When that thing died, an ’87 Honda CRX two-door with bald tires stepped in. It got me to the mountain in style, despite a few impromptu 360s on the icy highway to Big White. A burgundy Subaru wagon followed, lasting nearly a decade before I upgraded to a late-model Impreza.
But this spring, I decided to buy a snowmobile. That 2.0-liter Impreza engine wasn’t fit to haul it. So, I started searching for a truck. There was the utilitarian Ford Ranger and the pricey Toyota Tacoma. The idea was to add a box-top, put a platform in the back, and have a surf and snow rig that’s ready for whatever.
Then it hit me: Why not get a minivan? The Toyota Sienna, specifically, was available in AWD, had the same 266 horsepower engine as the Tacoma, and twice as much room inside as any pickup bed. Drop a trailer hitch on one and it’ll get you and a snowmobile where you need to go. But my vanity got in the way. Could I really drive a minivan? I may be 36 years old, but I don’t have any children. Unshackled dudes drive fast cars, or trucks, or something like that, right?
After coming to terms with my ego, I sold my Impreza and found a 2010 Sienna in Cashmere, WA for the same price. Even though I pulled the backseats out immediately, some friends made fun of me, asked when I was having children. Others inquired what I was going to do for a build-out. But I don’t see any need for a spendy interior. With push-button doors, a cargo box on the roof, and a foldable memory foam mattress that leaves ample space for gear storage, there’s more than enough room for weeks on the road. It’s a stealth camper if ever there was one. Plus, she gets 20 mpg and pulls that single-place sled trailer like nobody’s business.
Now I understand why my parents called that toaster-on-wheels the Dream Machine. You can keep your $60,000, top-heavy #vanlife sprinters and gas-guzzling converted cargo-haulers. I’m all about that minivanlife, man. And my girlfriend doesn’t even seem to mind.
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Dream Machine
https://digital.thesnowboardersjournal.com/articles/dream-machine